Doodle # 38

I think it goes without saying that a lot of us take our daily routines, our homes, our family and friends, and even our lives for granted. It's not intentional, but rather just an adverse effect of our constantly busy lives. We fill our days with work and chores, television shows and other mundane tasks. Until something causes a shift. 

Something tragic happened to a beloved friend of mine yesterday. Without warning, he was forced to deal with loss, regret, grief, guilt, and an immeasureable amount of pain. Not only for himself but for the family that it directly effected. As I sat and listened to him, my heart ached for him and for the family. The circumstances of what happened along with the chain of events that occurred changed the course of so many lives within minutes. As an outsider, I struggled to understand why something like this would happen. I attempted to relate, to fully take in if I were in his shoes. In the families shoes. It was so surreal. And impossible to fully comprehend. In twenty four hours, I have thought more about that family and what will become their new normal. I've also thought more about how we handle our guilt. How closely related regret and guilt can be when faced with an irreversibile life event. 

Mourning in and of itself is extremely difficult but when combined with regret and guilt, it will most definitely make the process of working through the loss even more gut wrenching. I've personally fought with my own guilt and regret when it came to my father's death. While I have found a way to forgive myself on some level for my transgressions, there are those around us that have not been able to find that inner peace. They walk around daily, carrying what they feel is a burden they are meant to own, rarely allowing themselves the freedom of forgiveness. 

That reminder of guilt, followed by the reminder of how time taught me the key to letting go, of how I allowed peace back in once I did let that guilt go, inspiried this drawing. 

I will continue to pray for those that were directly and indirectly effected by yesterdays events.  I wished more than anything that I could soothe the pains you are going through.